I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize