Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize