I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
