I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
