I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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