i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
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