i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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