is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize