Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize