i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
He unofficially told me he deleted his tinder because of me. I think that’s a pretty romantic gesture in 2018
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
