I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
A bitchslap is in order.
i out mim tonsoeep
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