so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Highlight of the night: paying my cell phone bill at the bar... I need to get laid.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
