did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
