You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I just put poptarts in the toaster with the wrapper on, that's how hungover I am.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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