finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize
