You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
