Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
