my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
