Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Randomize
