the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
