is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
