Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
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