Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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