doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
If Curt Schilling could pitch a game with that blood-filled sock... if Tiger Woods won the 2008 US Open with a torn ligament, then I'd be an embarrassment to the human race if I couldn't manage to at least jerk him off even if I was still crying after he put it in my butt.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Totally forgot Mike has only one ball. Is it sad I'm excited to see it? Or shall I say the lack of it?
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
