Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Randomize
