Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Randomize
