I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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