Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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