Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I could fuck to npr.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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