just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
My breasts were aching with rage.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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