Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
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