I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
