so explain again why im purple
no
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize