I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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