what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
