White coat. Heels.
I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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