Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
honey bunches of taint.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Randomize
