Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
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