yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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