ya dads aren't the best wingmen
He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
