so that wasnt chicken after all
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Randomize
