he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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