Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
