Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
