I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize
