it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
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