totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize