careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
