she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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