I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
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